Untitled

There’s a woman
on a swing
at 7.30am
trying for free
missing it completely
looking self conscious
and lost and
becoming the little girl
she wishes to be
in all the wrong ways
all the shy self depreciation
uncertainty in each shuddering
upward arc
to hang
exposed to the sky
then fall again
and again




I am driving past
the past
pedal flat to the ground
making the blur my company
talking to the smear of greenery
and concrete
colourless haze
in companionable familiarity
hoping for response

accepting sullen

My hands have melted to the wheel
becoming another shade of
chrome and steel
spinning left and right

Steering the course
a pilot at the helm of the Cutty Sark
cleaving waves with the salt spray
stinging cheeks and freezing fingers
to the weathered timbers
eyes clenched in grim determination
losing sight of elation

that joyful sensation I coveted

My car is another destination
a place travelling with me
somewhere to be go
a staff in the hands of a mage
wielding power
with the spark of ignition
replacing witch fire burning

I am taking me now

the howl of the engine
a raging wind released
a ravenous beast unleashed
upon the herd
slaying ideologies
and hope with the same
slavering rending fang indifference

I have no time left
because I have left it on
the kitchen bench
a post-it-note
stuck to a used plate
explaining
that I'm still not complaining
I just cannot face my face
any longer

The rear vision mirror
pushed to an angle
so I cannot see behind or within

And will you come?

Sister of the starlit sea
I know you wish to join me
in all my frail complexities

in all my blaze of glory
end of story finalities

I will look for you

on the yellow pink gentle palette
painted on the sunset I am heading for